Woody Allen Phrases: Wit, Wisdom & Neurotic Humor
Explore a collection of iconic Woody Allen phrases. Discover his intelligent wit, peculiar wisdom, and hilariously neurotic observations from the acclaimed filmmaker.
Sonhos de um Sedutor (1972): Allan Felix (Woody Allen), um crítico de cinema que consome filmes ansiosamente e idolatra “Casablanca”, é abandonado por Nancy Felix (Susan Anspach), sua mulher, que quer o divórcio pois não agüenta mais a insegurança emocional dele. Incapaz de lidar com este momento conturbado da sua vida, Allan busca consolo nos filmes que ama enquanto imagina Humphrey Bogart (Jerry Lacy) lhe dando conselhos de como Allan deve lidar com as mulheres.
Good people sleep much better at night than bad people. Of course, bad people have much more fun during the day.
More than ever before, humanity is at a crossroads. One path leads to absolute despair. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray that we have the wisdom to choose.
I was too young to have a car, so I would have sex with girls on the back seat of my bicycle.
It’s not that I’m afraid of dying. It’s just that I don’t want to be there when it happens.
Don’t despise masturbation – it’s having sex with the person you love the most.
I don’t want to achieve immortality through my work, but rather by not dying.
When I was little, my parents discovered that I had masochistic tendencies. So they started beating me every day to see if I would stop doing it.
The brain is my second favorite organ.
Man exploits man and sometimes it’s the other way around.
If God exists, why doesn’t He give me a sign of His existence? Like, for example, opening a nice account in my name in a Swiss bank?
It’s not just that God doesn’t exist, try calling the fireman on the weekends.
I used to walk through the woods thinking about Christ. If He was a carpenter, how much did He charge for the shelves?
What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely paid too much for my carpet.
Why are our days numbered and not, let’s say, lettered?
My only regret in life is not being someone else.
Most of the time I don’t have much fun. The rest of the time I don’t have any fun at all.
Life is divided between the disgusting and the miserable.
My way of laughing at all of this is through the truth. It’s the most fun game.
I hate reality, but it’s the only place where you can eat a good steak.
80% of success comes from exposing ourselves.
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